Well...here we are 3rd or 4th time this winter having the flu/fever again. Dawson is sick again as well. What a trooper he is! I am so blessed to have such a happy child. He is still so fun and smiling even when he's sick. It really makes an impact on my attitude that's for sure. I was watching him sleep and it got me thinkin about my childhood and sickness....
I definitely have plenty of memories waking up in the bathroom in the middle of the nights, or sleeping next to my parents door in the hallway just to have more comfort. I was born with a way too sensitive stomach (thats what my mother says) or a horrible immune system. My mom claims I was always the first to get sick, and then it would run through my family, and I would get it again. Lucky me right? She would say it would happen once a month at least. I remember not wanting to wake my mom up from not feeling well, so I'd sleep next to her door in the hallway, or go take a bath.
One night I fell asleep in the tub. I'm not sure how long I'd been in there. My dad drove truck and was usually gone all week, but would stop in once or twice in the middle of the week to shower and get a good meal. Well... I was very lucky that he choose to stop in this night. He was trying to wake me up in the tub, the water was pretty cool, and it's the first time I remember my dad actually being pretty stern with me and saying, "No more baths at night."
Now that I'm older, I thought maybe I'd become immune to all the flu's right.... Wrong. they still come often... I hate to say we are always sick, cuz I don't think we are. But I feel like we catch more than normal in the Stevens household...between me and Dawson anyways.
It's pretty sad for Dawson since he can't explain he's not feeling well.. If I don't get sick right away and he has been sick, I feel like a terrible mom in not being in-tune with his tummy. :) sounds funny, but I think I'm going to try more.
Also, I'm not very patient about it. When J.D. gets sick I honestly don't feel compationate enough. I realize it, but need to control it more. I start thinking, well i didn't get sleep and when I'm sick I deal with it and do things myself....Well, J.D. does do a lot more than I realize when I'm sick. anyways, it's a weak part of me that I intend to make stronger. I don't want to be that way when my kids are sick.
Another thing of being sick...it's working as the best birth control ever. It reminds me of being pregnant, and I'm extremely terrified to get pregnant again. I have had a huge scare this month with being sick and not having a period.(I've had one every month since Sept.-which isn't normal for me) I just cried and cried praying I wasn't pregnant. I feel like my body is just gettng back to its normal cycle though-which is 3-4 times a year. Yay for me. :) I'm definitely not pregnant. I love being a mom and I certainly want more children, but I don't know if I can handle it. I just don't have a strong enough mind set for now anyways. And I don't feel like its time. I guess the Lord knows us best right?
Anywho, enough ranting... I just felt like sharing. :)
