The Igloo Incident

One of the many responsibilities of J.D.'s job is snow shoveling. He is lucky because they provide him with a 4-wheeler that has a plow on it. One snowy snowy night before Christmas I had just finished delivering cinnamon rolls to all our friends. When I got back J.D. asked if I'd help with shoveling entry ways while he drove the 4-wheeler and got the sidewalks. Of course I did because I secretly think its peaceful to be outside when it's snowing and no one is out at night. We got home and there it was... a snowman right in front of our stairs to our house! It was the cutest snowman and very well hand-crafted. It had a ship captain's hat on and from that we knew our good friends Doug and Megan were the pranksters behind this. It was cute, but pretty hilarious because we couldn't exactly get into our house. ALSO- it wasn't something Dawson was about to let get crushed and swept away.... he was SO excited and the snowman had to stay. 

As we managed to meneuver around this snowman, we finally made it out and were shoveling the snow. When I finished the studio entry ways I started on the 1st row of the 4-plexes...which is the row Doug & Megan live on. To get back at them, J.D. and I had discussed plowing snow high in front of their door with the 4-wheeler. I had a more grand plan. I had to make it cute, just like the snowman being cute. So I grabbed an empty ice cream bucket out of our house and began building. 

J.D. drove by on the 4-wheeler looking for me and found me working diligently on this awesome igloo for our friends. He just about crashed because he was laughing so hard. We took a pic, left the crime scene, and sent the pic to our friends. Their response, "No way!" Doug also managed to say, "I knew we should have built ours taller!" HAHA

 The funny part about all of this is that Doug had texted J.D. a couple of times asking if he was home yet because they were anxiously awaiting to hear about our reaction to their snowman. Little did they know, we had seen the snowman and were already creating a suprise for them. 

It was pretty awesome and one of the best snow days we've had in a long time. Thank- you Doug and Megan for our beautiful snowman, but our igloo was taller. :-)

The Andee Necklace

When we came home, some of our friends came to visit us. Jeff and Andrea Roundy brought us a necklace shaped like a heart. On the heart is says, "Andee M'lee" and on the back it is her actual footprints from the hospital. It is such a special necklace and continues to have more significance every day. Sunday, right before New Years we went to church. Dawson was brought to me by his amazing teachers. He said he was scared and felt alone. He just wanted to be with his mom because he was sad. It's so hard because I know Dawson has feelings and is still affected by Andee not being able to be with us. 

Me: "Daws, you really have to go to class because mommy needs to go listen in her class. What can I do so you won't be scared or sad?"

Dawson: "Well.....I have a great idea. (pause) Maybe I could wear your Andee necklace so Andee can be with me and I won't be alone.....?" 

Of course, I tried to hold back my tears, "That is a great idea. But you have to keep it a secret and wear it under your shirt so know one knows and it won't get broken."

So we put it on and tucked it under his shirt. He could feel the heart on his skin and said, "Mom! I can feel her heart on my heart." 

It means so much to me that he still has a bond with her, and thinks about her often. I don't want her to be forgotten and one of the biggest reasons we wanted another baby was for Dawson to have a best friend to always play with. Even though she can't physically be with us, we know he see's her and feels her. He doesn't just create the bond on his own, she really is with him and I'm so grateful for it. 

Merry Christmas!

Two weeks before Christmas we took Dawson to see the Temple in St. George, show him the Nativity they set up and all the lights. He absolutely loved it! He kept trying to touch the figurines- it was hilarious. He wanted to pet the camels too. Then he found the stairs and had to climb all the way to the top and then said, "Take a picture!"

 So we did. He is such a handsome little man!

This year we spent Christmas in Holden! We love going there for Christmas because the entire family gets together and sleeps in the same room Christmas Eve. It was so much fun! We had a pretty crazy adventure getting to Holden, but we did make finally in 6 long hours. 

First- we had to take the truck because there was no way we could fit everything in our car. This was a huge blessing in the end. We also were taking my dad's 4-wheeler and trailer up to Holden for my brother Choc to take to his place. We got about 1 mile before the paragonah exit and there was a guy on the side of the road with a thrashed tire. J.D. said, "Man, that guy has a thrashed tire." I didn't quite hear him, but thought he was talking about our own tire. I looked in the rear view mirror and said, "J.D.! The trailer tire is gone!" He didn't quite believe me, but thought we'd better check. So thank heavens the Paragonah exit was right there. We pulled off and onto the frontage road. Sure enough- the tire was completely gone! SO- we called my dad who had to go to Walmart to get a new tire on a rim, and drive it up to us. 

In the meantime, J.D. was working his mad negotiating skills on getting a discount on a tire with the Walmart Tire Center manager. You see, the tire that had blown completely OFF was the brand new tire J.D. had just bought not even a month prior. Mind you it was freezing outside and only getting colder as J.D. stood outside for over an hour negotiating, pacing (because he cannot stand/sit still while on the phone), and fixing the tire with my dad. Dawson was fast asleep and I accomplished winning several Solitaire games..... I passed winning over 1,000 since we'd had the Ipad, which wasn't even a month. My dad took the trailer home- second blessing even though it wasn't under the circumstances we'd prefer. 

Coming out off of the mountain down into the flats before Kanosh a HUGE drift of snow blew across causing the car in front of us to slam on their brakes. It forced the car we were passing off the right side of the freeway into the ditch, and swerved back into us, ramming into the truck, causing us to slide down into the median. We kept a good speed so we could try and get back up on the freeway. Needless to say, J.D. is the best drive (next to me) and we were okay. We backed up to the other vehicle who hit us and spoke with a guy who was in the driver seat. The police came about 20 minutes later telling us to drive down to the Kanosh exit. There we waited for another 1 1/2 hours waiting for the cop to come talk to us. He sent another cop because he was busy with other accidents. We saw 7 tow trucks with banged up cars while we waited. Not only had we waited, but the drivers in the other car switched....so we told the officer. Because we didn't actually see who was driving during the accident, the officer couldn't charge them.... however even their stories didn't match up with who was driving. They were Arabs from California driving a rental..... so since then we've been dealing with insurance trying to get our vehicle fixed. Everything should work out soon, and we were so grateful that we were in the truck with 4 wheel drive, and didn't have the trailer and 4 wheeler hitched up.

When we did make it to Holden, we were exhausted and ready to have a more 'Merry' Christmas. During our adventure i had talked to my dad several times, not just the trailer, but also because he used to be a cop and knew a little more on what we could expect from insurances, and the officer. He kept saying 'Have a merry Christmas..." At the end of the conversation before we got to Holden he just said, "I'm not gonna wish u a Merry Christmas until you are in Holden.... soooo goodbye." When we made it to Holden, my dad said, "So you are inside the house, warm, and safe?" I replied, "Yep!" And then he said, "Well, then you have a Merry Christmas!" haha! It was hilarious!

The next day J.D. woke up with a rash forming all over his body. 5 days prior to the day J.D. had gone to the doc and found out he had a sinus infection. So the doc prescribe ammoxacillin (sp?). 5 YEARS prior to this J.D. had been prescribed the same thing for mono and he broke out in a rash all over. They said it was because he was diagnosed wrong.... well we found out he is actually allergic to penicillins. SO- he stopped taking the medication, but it was too late. The medicine was in his system and it took 2 weeks for the rash to disappear on his skin and another 2 weeks for his insides to stop itching. 

Back to the fun side of Christmas....
Here is Dawson the night before Santa came.... sooo many presents already!

We all slept in Loni and Daniel's room upstairs on the floor. We woke up around 8:00 and made our way to see what Santa had left us. This is the grandkid line up from oldest to youngest (Taylee, Dawson, Destry, Kyson). Usually we do the kids and grandkids, but we are getting so many grandkids, we decided to just do them.

Bryant (J.D.'s dad) had started Andee's cradle, but she came 4 weeks early...so we never got to see it finished and I didn't know if he would finish it because we didn't have a baby. When we got downstairs, there is was- our baby cradle. We didn't want to make Christmas sad, but J.D. and I just couldn't stop crying. I tried to hold it together for Dawson and be excited for him and what Santa brought him, but it was the most sentimental and sacred gifts we have/ and probably will ever receive. In it were 3 baby blankets that were J.D.'s when he was a baby.

Dawson got a imaginext space ship set, a baseball tee, a puppet show, some books, a story with Grandma and Grandpa's voices recorded reading it, a dream lite pillow, a race car track thingy, and a remote control helicopter (which was my suprise to him and J.D.). 

I got a heated blanket, the cradle (for J.D. and I) some movies, a porcelain doll that has brown curly hair (just like Andee's), a Chi straightner and curling iron, necklaces, and again for J.D. and I a scentsy thing. 

J.D. got a clay pigeon thrower, the helicopter thing, Gospel Answers book by Joseph Fielding Smith, some movies, and a blu ray wi-fi player.

It was pretty awesome! We had a delicious breakfast! and later we went to play in the snow! Here is Dawson, Jetta, and Brant being pulled behind the 4-wheeler!

 It snowed all day Monday, and Tuesday! It was so awesome! Dawson just loved army crawling and laying in the snow. It covered him up!

 He was so happy to be with his cousins and outside. He absolutely loves the snow!

 More sledding on the 4-wheeler! Lucas was awesome and tipped them a couple of times into the fresh powder! It was so funny to see the kids go flying!

 Brant, Jetta, and Tilden got igloo snow brick molds to build forts and things! So they did! Brant and Dawson built there's while Jetta and Jessie built the girl fort.... we didn't make it for the snowball war, but the forts were pretty awesome!

As we leave Holden, we never fail to make sure we go see Andee's grave. We feel like we are leaving her everytime we leave Holden. We hope one day we can make it back and have a home there so we can see her grave more often. 

The snowmen are solar lights that turn on at night. Dawson says they keep her safe so she doesn't get scared in the night. I know this is just her body here, but we do feel like she is there with us when we go to her grave. 

Christmas was so much fun and we opened more gifts when we got back to Cedar with my family. The only bad part is that Dawson wants Christmas to be every day!....

Surgery

Unfortunately (some would say fortunately) I am not going to post pics of the back surgery I had after the funeral. A little history of why I got back surgery- well for many years I have had this lump on my back. I didn't think anything of it until after getting married and J.D. giving me lots of back massages and telling me that the lump was getting bigger. While pregnant with Dawson, our doctor said we could probably get it removed after the baby was born and that he didn't think it'd be a problem getting in the way of the epidural. I ignored doing anything about it because I didn't think it was a big deal. This time around with Andee though, I wanted it gone because even I could tell it was getting huge and it was causing me a lot of unnecessary uncomfortable pressure.

We saw a general surgeon before having the baby and he said the lump was a lypoma and definitely met the requirements for our insurance to approve getting it removed and paying for it. A lypoma is very common and basically is abnormal fatty tissue growing. It's usually caused by constant stress to the spot where the lypoma would grow. So it builds up protecting the spot that's receiving stress or constant pressure over time. For mine, it was probably caused from dance all growing up. I was pretty excited knowing this thing would finally be gone, but even more happy after the experience with the epidual in the hospital. The morning I got the epidural to deliver Andee the lypoma was in the way of getting the epidural in the right spot, so the anesthesiologist had to put it in a lot lower which really hurt. So after Andee was born, and after the funeral we scheduled the surgery.

It was an in office surgery and didn't take long at all. It was kinda painful, but only because my body metabolizes anesthetics really fast. J.D. recorded the procedure and in the end we couldn't believe how big that thing was! It had veins running through it and was feeding itself plenty of nutrients. GROSS! It was pretty sucky having to deal with stitches, but I can definitely say it was well worth it. There is still a large cavity in my back from where the lypoma used to be, but overtime it is supposed to go away.

Thanksgiving

I unfortunately did not take any pics from our Thanksgiving adventures, but I do want to write about it and share. As most people eat their dinner during the afternoon, the Shelley's don't eat until 7:30 ish.... right about the time Thanksgiving is ending. It works perfect for Shelley folk because we tend to enjoying sitting around and watching the hours pass by until we finally decide that someone should really start cooking if we are going to celebrate this holiday the traditional way. So about 2 or 3 we started putting everything together. We didn't have a ton of fancy things... we used left over dinosaur napkins from Carson's birthday party, paper plates so we didn't have to do a ton of dishes, and we made the main course favorites for the dinner. We did manage to bake a few pies- of course we couldn't leave out dessert!

Dawson wanted to say the prayer... which was short and sweet, but in our hearts I know we all were thanking the Lord for more. J.D. and I scarfed down as much as we could so we could make it to the Hurricane Walmart for some Black Friday shopping! We made it there, split up to our designated items we were in charge of getting, and still had 10 minutes to spare! I was in charge of movies... needless to say I am an amazing shopper with really quick hands because we got every movie and more of what we planned on getting. You can't beat those $2.00 deals so any action necessary to get these movies had to be taken seriously. J.D. succeeded on his items too! We met up with all our items  standing in line for the next rush which started at 10 pm. We made it home later that evening with another successful Black Friday Adventure and no bruises or black eyes.

We headed up to Holden for some Christmas Tree hunting with the Stevens'. We made it just in time and hours later we found some beautiful Christmas trees for our families. We didn't get one because we borrowed a fake one from my mom. With how much we are gone during this month, its much easier to not have to worry about watering or picking up pine needles. We ate some snacks and headed back home to take some long naps. We stayed the whole weekend and had such a good time sledding, visiting, building furniture, going to the movies, seeing the light parades, and riding in a horse buggy thing. Grandpa Stevens drives the team and pulls people around for a ride during the holidays. Dawson got to ride up frontwith him and had the biggest smile on his face the whole time.

Now- during the light parade they always feature Santa on the fire truck. We were pumping up Dawson to wave to Santa and he couldn't hardly stand there waiting. FINALLY the fire truck went by and Dawson started to wave really BIG and say "Hi....sssaann"and it ended. He got this confused look on his face and then turned to us saying, "That's not Santa. That's just some guy in a costume." Yes our 4 year old can tell if it's Santa or just some guy dressed up. So I said, Ÿa, Sant couldn't be here so this guy is helping him out."After that, Dawson didn't care to even go sit on his lap. He just said, "No, I don't need to tell him because he's not Santa. I will just wait until the real Santa comes."

It was an awesome Thanksgiving spending time with all of our family. We did go up to Andee's grave and decorated it along with J.D.s sister's headstone, Aunt JoAnn's, and Grandpa Stevens'. We put glow in the dark snowmen, and poinsettas. Dawson thought the snowmen were a good idea so Andee wouldn't get scared in the dark. He's such a good big brother! :-)

Andee M'lee Stevens

Andee M'lee Stevens was born on November 7th, 2012 weighing 6 lbs 6 oz., and was 20 inches long. She was born 4 weeks early and was stillborn. She was honestly the most beautiful baby with precious features. She looked a lot like my baby pictures except she had more hair- beautiful brown curly hair.

The birth was the most spiritual experience and it continues to leave the biggest impression on so many lives. One week prior to her birth I had gone in for kick counts- she felt like she was slowing down compared to her normal ways. Everything was fine- it was like murphy's law. The Sunday before she passed away our sweet Dawson and I were waiting in the car and 

Dawson said, "Mom- Andee needs to go back to Heavenly Father and Jesus."

I replied, "Why would you say that? That makes mommy really sad."

Dawson, "It's okay mom. Don't be sad. She's happy. She's with family. . . . She'll come back to us though."

I had a great concern fill my heart because since I'd gone in for kick counts, I had been telling J.D. all week that she just wasn't as active as she'd been. I told J.D. what Dawson said and we both didn't quite understand if 'coming back to us' meant the second coming or if she was just going to leave for a bit and come back to earth to be with us here. The next evening I stopped feeling her move. I wanted to go in for kick counts again, but last time they had made us feel really dumb for coming in because she was doing just fine. So we didn't go in- however I'm pretty sure that's the day her spirit left.

The next morning we went in for kick counts, and we couldn't find a heartbeat. The doctor informed us our baby had died. It was words that will never be forgotten and I still hear them. We scheduled to be induced the next morning. During the rest of that day was the longest day and night of our lives. My mom came to be with us as soon as she found out. 

The delivery was truly amazing. J.D.'s brother Lucas and his wife Molly, and Loni came at 7 am to be with us the entire day. I can't describe how much comfort that was for us to have them be there the entire time helping us through that hard day. I was already dialated to a 3.5. I was checked at 9:00 and had made it to a 5. Then at 10:30 exactly the nurse came in and we decided she'd check me again at 11. She walked out and I turned right to J.D. and said, "Go get her, I think it's time and she needs to check me now." She checked me and sure enough, it was time. She hurried and set up, the doctor rushed down and within 2 pushes, less than 30 seconds, Andee M'lee was born. No stitiches, no tearing, and she beat Dawson's delivery by 1 push (I only pushed 3 times with him). Everyone kept commenting on how beautiful she was! It was true! She had color and features that were so stunning. Dawson was SO PROUD! He wasn't scared at all and understood that she wasn't coming home with us, however, he understood her spirit was right there with us as well.

J.D.'s brother Lucas and his wife took care of everything with the funeral. J.D. and I were able to just hold Andee at the mortuary all day Thursday and Friday and Saturday morning. The funeral was so perfect. So many answered prayers and support. My brother drove his whole family from Missouri, my dad drove from Colorado, J.D's aunt and uncle came from Idaho, tons of family from everywhere came to be there. J.D.'s parents and Chet and Bobi Sue were coming home from a cruise- and because of the storm, a lot of flights right after theirs were cancelled to fly into SLC. It was a huge blessing they were able to make it. The snow was prayed for by J.D. He asked that if we were to have any precipitation let it be snow. We were driving home the night it started to snow and just felt like it represented Andee's pure spirit and also that it covered up all the bad in the world to make her funeral more pure and clean of any bad in this world. 

Dawson and I made a bracelet for Andee and Dawson was so excited to put it on her. He is so proud of her and I know he has a special bond with her even though she isn't physically here. He continues to love her everyday and reminds us of it- it's the sweetest thing.

 Saturday morning we got her smelling like a little baby and made her look beautiful for the day. We'd asked my mom and J.D.'s mom to be there to help us. It was one of my favorite memories because it was the first time and last time here on earth that I would be able to doll up my baby girl. The dark spot on her cheek as discoloration happened that morning- before that she stayed pink. The dark spot was a blister that had dried up which was invisible to everyone that day. Only the pictures show it was there.

 J.D.'s parents gave us some golden baby shoes with diamonds in them to hang in our window. It's so when the sun shines through, rainbows are reflected everywhere which is to remind us of Andee. Dawson shook them and just kept trying to keep her happy he said. It was really  like her spirit was there and he was interacting with her.

 We got lots of pictures and family photos because this is all we will have of Andee here on earth. Dawson was loving showing off his sister and kept introducing her to everyone. He is so amazing and we couldn't be more grateful for him being here with us.

Everyday and every moment is a struggle, but we know her spirit is here. Dawson tells us so many things about Andee- it's so neat. We don't know what we'd do without him. He keeps reminding us of how happy Andee is and how she is with Heavenly Father. He's our little spiritual giant and gets us through most days. I can't describe all the spiritual experiences we continue to have, and how Andee's passing has truly opened our eyes. We know she must have been pretty special to only need 36 weeks here on earth to accomplish he mission and then be granted celestial glory immediately. We definitely miss her and can hardly wait until we get to raise her. Thank goodness we have the knowledge of the gospel to help get us through- I can't imagine going through this without the gospel knowledge. 

As we left the graveside to go to the church for a luncheon that the Holden ward had prepared for us (THANK U) we looked into the sky and this is what we saw. The heavens opened and I could only imagine Andee holding hands with Aunt JoAnn and walking away to the spirit world. 

Thank you to everyone who has been praying for us and supporting us. :-)

Family Pictures 2012

 We went up the mountain to find some fall leaves to take some family pictures....we haven't done this for 2 years sadly. We found one spot, but the lighting just wasn't right, so we continued to drive over the mountain until we found it- the perfect spot. The sun didn't glare us out or make us squint, and the leaves were perfect. We had to chase 2 deer off because they were right in the spot when we saw it. We had so much fun doing this together. It was more than just pictures, we let Dawson play and we shook leaves all over him. Those are the pictures that always turn out- the ones where you are truly enjoying yourself and acting natural. 

 Dawson and his daddy! He truly loves his dad and wants to be just like him. We took several shots of Dawson rubbing his dad's beard, telling him secrets "you're fired" and laugh, and listening to his heart.

I have wanted pictures of Dawson and Andee in my tummy for awhile now, but everytime I had a chance for someone to do them I just wasn't feeling very pretty or picture worthy. We finally got some and I couldn't be more excited. Dawson found a TINY acorn and wanted to show Andee. He found leaves and showed her. He would talk to her and then in a tiny voice pretending to be Andee, "oh cool." Then he look at me and say, "Mom, she likes them!" It was so cute to watch and listen.

 This turned out so cute and yet I was just taking a break letting Dawson give leaves to Andee. He would set them on my tummy until he found the perfect one for her to keep.

 J.D. was shaking leaves on us and we were just laughing so hard at him trying to take a picture, hold his balance, and throw leaves at us. He's a pro photographer because he managed to snap this one!

 Dawson trying to catch the leaves falling from above. He was loving life!

 Now that we'd let Dawson play, he started to be a turkey about taking family pictures. We'd set the tripod up, and the timer. I would click the button and have to run clear down to get in position. Needless to say, it took about 15 tries to get Dawson to do what we wanted. He would be perfect, and then once I sat down he'd put a leaf on my head, or poke me with a stick, or put his chin down on the log. It was actually pretty funny. We finally got a couple that worked, but I'm suprised it didn't put me into labor all that running and getting up and down. Of course, Dawson thought it was hilarious!

 So.... after all that running we decided to let Dawson play photographer cuz he really is good at it. We set the camera so he could just keep clicking over and over...and that's exactly what he did. J.D. and I just stood down there talking, smiling, and doing our own thing while Dawson just kept pushing the button.

 Dawson has his father's photography skills- we couldn't believe all the amazing shots he got. These are just some of our favorites. When we looked through the pics later, Dawson took over 40 pictures of J.D. and I in just 3 minutes or so!

Afterwards we went to Todd's and ate dirt burgers and relaxed for a bit. We then drove around and looked for spike elk to fill J.D.'s tag. We saw plenty of deer, but no elk. Dawson even saw a couple bucks that J.D. and I had completely missed. 

We had an awesome day and it was so nice to spend together as a family. We are really excited to have Andee come and be able to have more days like this with her. Dawson really can't wait- every day he comes up to me or J.D. telling us how excited he is for her to come. It's so special and brings tears to my eyes because I can already see how amazing of a big brother he is going to be to Andee and how he will continue to make our life special with her here.

Pregnancy Things

I wanted to write about a few things that we've been experiencing so we can look back and remember what it was like being pregnant with Andee. As of today, we have 45 days left and I am 33.4 weeks along! WHOOHOO! She is EXTREMELY ACTIVE! J.D. and I can't believe how much she twists and turns and flips. We both are in shock watching my stomach move. How can she move that much in such a small space? We've compared her movement to the Twilight movie where Bella is pregnant and how strong the baby is because it's half vampire half human....... sooooo we either have a boxer or a half vampire half human baby.

Today at the check-up the doctor couldn't get a good listen to the heartbeat for a bit because she kept moving. He'd put the monitor on one side and she roll to the other side. He kept trying to follow her and was laughing because you could see her move. You could also see where she was at.... she didn't have much option for hiding spots in the hide and seek game, but she sure was fast at moving.

Dawson is still really in-tune with her. He will randomly come  up to J.D. or I and say, "I'm so excited for Andee to come." It's the sweetest thing. He also will feel her move and tell me, "That's her feet mom! She kicked me!" It's crazy that he knows how she's turned and what part is her feet- he's always right too.

I'm definitely experiencing a lot more pain that I ever did with Dawson. If I'm not dialated, I think I might cry because things have been so painful. I've had the braxton hicks contractions going on since about 24 weeks. The past 2 months they have gotten SO strong I literally can't walk, talk or breathe. Anywhere I am at, those contractions stop me in my tracks for a good 2 minutes. When telling the doctor he just said drink more water, empty my bladder more, and it could be the result of chasing Dawson around. Last time I didn't have anyone to chase around, so it makes a difference.  There is a lot of pressure... A LOT! I also have pelvic bone pain randomly strike.... I can honestly say that if women could have an epidural at 32 weeks I think more women would get pregnant more often. I want to have this little girl because I don't want to be in pain anymore, but I really want her to be fully developed and healthy so ..... 6 1/2 more weeks here we go.

The other day I was lifting something I thought I could handle and turned while bending back up and TEAR all across my abdomen. That with pinching my sciatic nerve all the time just about makes me want to put myself on bed rest. It is killer! lol! I laugh because I still have to learn the hard way for things.... they tell you to take it easy and be careful. However, I guess i haven't grasped the concept of listening to others rather than trying to be so independent.

As far as getting ready for this little one.... its definitely different than with Dawson. With Dawson I truly went through a nesting phase, and had EVERYTHING ready to go before he got here. With Andee.... we've been slowing getting ready, and focusing on the necessities of what we actually need. We don't have a lot of room and we don't have a ton of money, so it's changed our mindset of getting ready. J.D. and I joke that when it is actually time to go to the hospital it's going to completely catch us off guard and we will regret not getting serious about getting more things ready for her arrival and waiting until the last minute. It makes me wonder if that's going to be more her personality though. I wonder if that's why i haven't been able to know of her arrival date like I did Dawson. She probably doesn't know either and will just decide on a random day that she's coming. .... after she's born I will tell the story of when I think and have felt she will be arriving. After having one baby, we've realized what we actually need and what we can go without.

Since the beginning of the pregnancy I have told J.d. that I just don't think she will be very big. With that, I haven't even gained half as much as I did with Dawson- thank heavens! I am measuring good as far as being on my own track, but I'm not huge by any means. J.D. will say I definitely look pregnant, but not ready to pop in any way.

All in all- it just feels surreal that Andee will be arriving shortly. I just haven't totally grasped that fact that we will have 2 children. I think it's because it will feel so normal for her to be here. Since we've found out it was a girl J.D. and I have had such a complete and whole feeling. It wasn't a suprise and it's the right time for her to be here. I'm not sure how to explain it, but we are excited and can't wait to meet her.

Dawson turns 4!!

I can't believe our little man is 4 years old! We were so blessed to have so many people come celebrate his birthday with us. We feel extremely grateful for all of our family who drove so far to come and all of our friends who were able to make it. 

We asked Dawson what he wanted for his birthday and he said, "I want my family to come play." For a 4 year old, we were completely amazed by his answer. That's all he wanted even when we asked him if he wanted toys or what kind of cake, Dawson just wanted to play with his cousins. He has the sweetest and biggest heart ever and once again, we couldn't be more blessed that God chose J.D. and I to be his parents. 

We had a small party later that day, but then had the real party Saturday. It was absolutely amazing! We went to the Canyon Park to have cake, ice cream, and a pinyata. It couldn't have worked out to be more perfect- we went to pick out a pinyata and they had a PIRATE PINYATA!!! What are the chances?! 

Story: I was looking up at all the pinyata's haning in walmart and suddenly I hear Dawson gasp and say, "Oh MY GOSH! It's a pirate!" I looked down and it completely blew my mind to see a pirate on the shelf. Dawson's next response, "Holy freak mom- I'm freaking out." HAHA! Of course, I busted up laughing and we threw the pinyata in the basket. :-)

I also attempted to make a pirate ship out of rice krispies for his cake..... I froze the rice krispies into a block and my amazing husband with his amazine perceptual abilities and manual dexterity skills carved out a pirate ship. We kept the ship frozen until it was time to put it on the cake..... well, a good note for next time is that rice krispies don't hold very good once they start to warm up again. Needless to say, it kind of fell apart. BUT it still looked pretty cool.

Dawson and Kage (and Carson in the background)

 Make a wish Dawson!

Dawson received so many amazing gifts! He got LOADS of pirate stuff- treasure chest, gold, telescopes, beads, patches, hats, scarves, swords, hooks, and a compass. He also got a microphone with an amp, race tracks, books, pirate stickers, a 'Dawson size' football, a mini hymbook (he has wanted one forever), book of mormon action figurines, guns, yummy treats and drinks, and a huge castle. He has not stopped playing with everything since then! THANK YOU to everyone who was able to make it and for all the gifts.

AAARRRRGGG!!

 Here's Carson and Dawson with Dawson's new pirate stuff!

At the party when we finished, Dawson ran to every single person there and gave them a hug and told them 'Thank you.' He really has the biggest heart and really loves everyone.

Visitor from California

My best friend since I was 3 years old came to visit from California! She has a daughter that is 10 months younger than Dawson, and is the CUTEST thing ever! We had so much fun just catching up and they came on Dawson's real birthday, so they got to celebrate with us.

Dawson was more than willing to give her loves and take pictures with her... I'm not sure what she thought, but you can decide from the picture. lol!

 One of the best parts about our kids is that they both LOVE pirates! So, since Dawson is pirate every day, he was able to share his pirate stuff with Addison and his cousin Carson. We had an extra pirate costume thanks to Aunt Jamie who's let Dawson borrow one (THANK YOU JAMIE). We decided to get Dawson his own since he has a pirate addiction.

 Dawson was pretty sad that his friend had to go. Afterwards he kept telling me how  cute she was. Now he asks for his cute girl friend to come play.

It was such a great day to see my bestie and let our kids play. My sister Jori drove up as well and let Carson play with Dawson for his birthday as well. It was so much fun! Dawson just wanted his birthday to last forever.

Primary Program Practice

Dawson has his first primary program coming up, so we have been practicing his line. To make it official, Dawson wanted a microphone like at church to practice with.... so we got a microphone and improvised since we don't have a podium. 

 We even turned on the primary children's songs CD and Dawson practiced singing songs as well as saying his part. It was the coolest thing and he's a pretty good singer!

 His part is, "Noah, his family, and the animals were safe because Noah made a choice to follow God."

Dawson has the 'Noah made a choice' down which is pretty awesome I think. I got to listen to him practice in church that day too, and he did so good! He sang so proudly and kept waving to me- it was the cutest thing ever! I'm so lucky to be his mom. :-)

Seeing Miss McKynlee

It took us a couple weeks to be able to go see McKynlee because we had all been sick with a cold. Mckynlee was put in the NICU because they couldn't get her jaundice count to go down- it was pretty scary. She was in there for about 3 1/2 weeks under intensive light therapy, and special formula (which was super nasty). Together they finally were able to get her count down and to stay down so she could go home. 

Here is the little one under the lights in the NICU. Dawson didn't get to go in and look at her inside the NICU, so we had to come back a week later when she was able to do the light therapy in Jori's hospital room.

 Here is Dawson's first visit with Mckynlee! He was so intrigued by her. He kept touching her hands and fingers saying, "Mom, they are so cute and tiny." It was so sweet. He just kept watching her and would get so excited anytime she would move. He absolutely loved feeling her hair- it was so soft! It made me more excited to have our own little Andee arrive. Dawson is going to be such a sweet brother.

 J.D.'s first time holding her. It was unreal to see how small she was up against his biceps and hands. His arms were huge next to her small body. She was so calm while he held her.

 Dawson giving her lots of kisses- it was soooo sweet!

 And.... I FINALLY got to hold her after a much anticipated wait!

Mckynlee is home now and doing so much better. In fact, while in the hospital Jori really tried to push for her to be in Jori's room and sleep there instead of the NICU. When they finally allowed it, McKynlee's jaundice count automatically started dropping. It's amazing how a mother's instinct and presence can change the life of a child. It really makes me feel more confident in my decisions for my children as well. I can't wait for Andee to get here- only 10 more weeks! Holding McKynlee just keeps making me more excited for Andee.

FALL is here

Fall is here- at our house anyways! It's my FAVORITE season with my favorite holiday- Halloween. Fall is such an amazing time of year. There are so many reasons I love it. I had J.D. bring home all the fall decorations and they are up! I'm dying because I want to do more and more every year. 

We even have a pumpkin carved! 

 Dawson isn't much for the 'scary' part of fall because he likes things to be happy and content. You might not guess that with his temper, but he really likes everyone to be happy. So...he found a happy face for him and his dad to carve into the first pumpkin. It will probably go bad soon....but we will just keep carving more all season. Dawson is so proud of his pumpkin. He even helped get the goey seedy mess out of the pumpkin.

He is so handsome!

When the fall decorations were opened up, Dawson went crazy with helping putting it all up. His memory of what goes where and what is used for what amazes me! I put up the scarecrow and he said, "Mom we can play some funny jokes on people with the scarecrow!" and "We need to get candy to put in here." he said that for our little guest candy jar. We are so excited fall is here and Dawson is dying for Halloween to come. He could almost care less about his birthday because halloween is so cool. lol!

McKynlee's Birth

I had the most amazing experience of being able to be there for my niece's birth. It was like nothing I'd ever expect. It was the neatest thing. My other niece, Sari, my mom, me, and my mom's friend were all there to see McKynlee come into the world a little after midnight.

This is my younger sister and I minutes before McKynlee arrived.

 This was the first picture of her, and she was even still attached to the umbilical cord. She had been here for less than 20 seconds!

 Look at her big lips! The next day all the swelling went down and she looked totally different. She weighed 8 pounds 8 ounces, was born 2 1/2 weeks early, and was 23 inches long. I can't imagine how big she'd have been if she was born on her due date.

I'm grateful my sister let me be there because it was such a neat experience. i still have yet to hold her because we left a little after she was born. J.D. and Dawson have been sick so we are waiting until they are completely better before going around her and her family. It makes me more excited for our little Andee to arrive.... 3 more months!

Snowflake Road Trip

Soon after the reunion we headed down to Snowflake Arizona to see family and attend a good friend's reception. The trip took about 6 hours, so we did stop a couple of times on the way. 

Dawson decided to 'share' his candy......

 We stopped at Glen Canyon Dam to show Dawson the bridge and the dam. He thought it was cool, but kind of scary. I will agree with the kind of scary- the bridge would move as the cars drove over it and the wind was blowing so strong!

We stayed at my Aunt Kathy's house. (My dad's brother's house). My cousin lives with her parents so Dawson had cousins to play with. They had so much fun! it was beautiful weather and their house is right below the Snowflake temple. 

Saturday night we went to our friend, J.P's, reception. We were so excited to see him because we hadn't seen him for 5 years! The story behind J.P.: we worked at the Village Apartments for 2 years and while working there, J.P and his brother came in looking for an apartment. I noticed they were from Taylor Arizona so I immediately got excited because that's where my cousins (the other Shelley's) lived. They knew them and seemed pretty awesome people so i offered J.P. a job. He and J.D. became way good friends and we knew it'd be a life long friendship. He is such a genuine person and we had some awesome memories with him. We weren't about to miss his wedding, so here we are. 

 When we walked in, we stood back for a second just seeing if J.P. would notice us or even remember us. I told J.D. I didn't think he'd recognize us because we both have gotten fat. lol! His face made the trip all worth it. He just got big eyed and opened his mouth with shock. He was the only one there who knew who we were and so EVERYONE was giving us confusing looks like, "who are these people..." J.P. just left the line and grabbed us both. He started crying because he was in disbelief. We started tearing up because we all knew that our friendship was so much more and had missed each other so much. It was such an amazing night and the BEST reception ever. 

 Dawson was WAY into the girls and dancing. He'd go up and ask them to dance. It was the cutest and yet hardest thing as parents to watch. He'd slowly make his way towards the girl he wanted to dance with and right as he got upto her, she would run off or walk away (SHE didn't realize Dawson was right behind her when this would happen, so it wasn't like she was turning him down.) Dawson would then look at us and you could see he was disheartened. However, he tried over and over and over again. Finally, I gave him a little help by actually asking the girl and getting her attention... so here he is. Isn't he so handsome!???

 He did come ask me to dance first before any other girls. It made me feel so special. He wanted me to dance all night with him, but I had to let him venture out and see other girls.

I was the happiest mother ever. 

The next day we went to Heber to show Dawson and J.D. a little Shelley history. The Shelley's have been a part of Heber from the beginning. This is the Heber house the my dad and Uncle still own. 

 Here is a road named after the Shelley's.

 We went to the cemetary to see my grandparents grave sights. Dawson wasn't super into pics today, but we got a couple.

 This is my grandma and grandpa Shelley. I have little, but fond memories of them. My sister Amy always says that out of all the kids, I look the most like my grandmother... so we looked at pics of my grandma when she was younger and its funny how much resemblence there really is. I know where I get my face shape, my cheeks, and curly hair. (curly hair also comes from my mom's mother as well).

 This is my dad's other brother who passed away when he was 13, Gary.

 Dawson picked wild flowers and kept putting them in my hair- it was so sweet.

It was neat to show Dawson a little history of my family. He now thinks that every cemetary is where my father's father died. Little kids are so innocent and sweet. Sometimes their understanding makes life seem so simple. 

We had such a good time and really enjoyed the weekend. It was short, but it was filled with amazing memories and we left feeling like it was more than worth it to come. We were so happy we could make the trip.